Wowsers!!!

Wowsers!! Since my last post I have taken this all into my own hands, eating what I want when I want....UGH!!  some days I follow my plan, and lately I really have not had the desire if any to care.... about any of it.

With that being said, I have been contemplating what my next step is going to be.  I have discussed this with Travis as well as a few of my friends and Sandy.  I am going to work on getting to my goal weight, then see when the next competition is.  This will take a large amount of stress off of me.

So over the weekend I was thinking of how I was going to accomplish my goal. I broke it down into daily, weekly, monthly, 3 month and a 6 month goal.  I am excited again to get busy eating right, getting my energy back, looking and feeling amazing.

We did decide to move, and that will take place in two weeks.  Also Jax will be starting Pre-school mid August as well.  I am feeling better that those things are done and behind... well with the exception of moving.  But that will go smooth too.  Plus we have some great friends who are willing to help us out.  Thank God!!

This break has shown me how I don't want to feel.  As well as teach me how eating clean and healthy is so important for my life, not just to loose weight, but to have a healthy lifestyle for myself and my family.

Today is a new day {again}  but I am ready for it, and am excited to get back on my journey.  We will see where it takes me.  For now my goal is to get to my goal weight and then see what I want to do from there.


Have a great day!!

Today is a new day

I knew this adventure would be a roller coaster, what I didn't know was how much it would effect me when I was at the bottom of it.   I knew there would be lows, but yesterday I hit a horrible low.  This weekend was super tough.  My mind was running with everything imaginable going through it.... like how am I going to loose this weight in 10 weeks, can I loose this weight, is this goal realistic, are we going to move? If so when and where too?  Need to find a pre-school for Jax, where do I even start looking.  Oh it's time to eat my chicken AGAIN.  UGH!! Did you drink your water?  Did you take your scheduled supplement? And on, and on , and on.... I should have told it to SHUT UP like most times I do.  Well with all of this nonsense going I on I did not eat 100% which was my choice 100%!!  Am I happy with the results? NO. not at all!  But I did it, I put the food in my mouth, I did not do my cardio like I was instructed.  I take full resposibility for my actions, of course I am not that thrilled about it.

So what am I going to do?  Today is a new day, I know I can do this.  September is a bit unrealistic for me at this point.  Does this mean I have given up? No, it means that I will not be competitive enough and not at my best.  Which when I do this I want to look amazing, and I want to give the rest of the competitors a run for their money. 

How does this make me feel?  Not happy... but again, I am responsible for my actions. I have something deep down inside of me that keeps creeping up and creating road blocks for me.  This is very frustrating and very scary to me to even think that I have something {GASP} emotionally wrong with me... I am not even sure I want to deal with it right now. Or really know where to start.

Today I plan on getting through my day, following my meal plan, drinking all my water, taking all my supplements, and doing my cardio which is done already.  One day at a time, enjoying the journey, learning more everyday what God knows I can do, with his strength. 

So if you are wondering where I am at since my last measurement 3 weeks ago.  I have lost 5 lbs, maybe 1% body fat and just a few inches.  Yes this is amazing. I was hoping for a bit more loss in body fat but hey... I am proud of what I have accomplished thus far, I feel great, looking great, and I am at my lowest weight since getting married 10 years ago (almost).  Plus I am sure I am much healthier too.

I thank God daily for his strength, my health, and my well being.  Through Him all thing are possible.

Hope you all have a wonderful day!  Thanks for the continued support from all of you.